“Women’s intimate health, should the issues remain hushed or is it time we spoke out?”

This post is a part of the weekend blogging contest at BlogAdda.com in association with 18again.com

Women have always been the topic of discussion since centuries. As for today, there is no topic that hasn’t been discussed, thanks to advent of technology; women are able to ask questions through papers, internet, magazines, health experts and much more. No woman needs to be shy to ask questions especially if it concerns her health. The plus point here is that women can ask their doubts anonymously which protect personal issues as well.

The health of a woman has to be valued in every way possible. The problems that women face due to health are most of the times ignored in India. The fact that Indian women don’t take their health seriously leads to the subject being ignored. Though there are various health awareness camps that are being held, there are still areas where women’s intimate health issues such as sexual issues, bacterial vaginosis, Pelvic inflammatory disease, Chlamydia are not being spoken about. These are just examples but yes, there are more topics that being ignored. I bet most women haven’t even heard of these terms that are real issues dealing with women.

It’s time women brush aside the mask of embarrassment that has been used all this while to hide their problems. Simply not talking about the issue will not solve the problem. It’s time women come out of their cocooned shells and speak out their minds. When people are able to discuss their relationship issues, why the need to keep intimate health issues private?

There is need for more media spotlight on issues that deal with the intimate health of women. There are more magazines and articles provided to discuss national issues, sports, movies and entertainment. Definitely, there has to be more space for women talk. Online sites have been a handful of help because there are lots of women out there who don’t really use the internet. This gap has to be filled by the aid of newspapers, magazines and awareness programs. Hospitals and health clinics need to take this a serious concern.

Women health is a treasure, so let’s save it.

What culture is of murder?

Indian newspapers are doing a great job by getting all the stories right under our nose for our inspection and reflection, even though the life span of these stories lives in seconds. Well, stories these days are getting gruesome and terrible that one just wants to skip or read and forget about it. After all, life goes on no matter who dies or who lives. People dying in freak accidents, people killing each other for petty reasons, people killing themselves, people hatching plans to kill their kin and oh god; you don’t want to know more. The newspapers are disturbing.

Yet, these stories are not just some random stories. They are stories about those people who had once been alive just like you and me, breathing fresh air and drinking the same water that we all drink. But, they die one day in a way nobody can ever imagine.

One such incident that shook me is the death of Shafilea, a 17 year old Pakistani girl who was killed by her parents. When I read the whole coverage on NDTV, I was amazed with the kind of research the paper had done to bring the truth to its readers. That apart, the story itself is sickening. I don’t know if there could be a better word.

For those of you who don’t know this. 17 year old Shafilea was killed nine years ago in her Britain residence because her sin was that she belonged to a Pakistani family. As she grew up, she began to wear on the Britain culture which is customary. Most of us adapt to cultures because our friends, our social life and our education depends on what’s around us than what we originally hail from. Shafileabegan to have a life of her own – western clothing, boys, social life, movies and friends. To most of us, these things are absolutely normal just like how breathing is normal. Yet, Shafileahad to pay a price too huge with her life only because she fought to live life her way.

In 2003, her father, Iftikhar, 52, and her mother, Farzana, 49, killed Shafilea with a plastic bag by stuffing it inside her mouth until her heart stopped beating. That was the end of a life full of promise to retain the Pakistani culture of being cocooned in the world where girls are not allowed to live a life of their own. I want to ask the parents, if by owning their daughter’s life, they felt proud? If so, each one of would be living another’s lives. Since when did culture become more precious than our sons and daughters? This is clearly an act of shame which has been given justice after nine years by punishing the parents with life imprisonment by the Britain Police, thank to Shefani’s sister who provided the evidence being the witness.

What most people don’t realize is that nothing is permanent. Culture, status, money, people, and world – everything changes every minute even as you and I pass through day and night. We can’t control these changes, instead we learnt to adapt by making the right choices. There is no culture in killing. Murder doesn’t save culture, it destroys it. Real culture is within us, deep inside our hearts.

One life down, squashed dreams and hopes – I hold myself together until the newspaper prints another terrible story and there goes again, another life down.

Death and its ghastly face

I am 25. Most of the times, I have no idea what it means to be 25 but I do know that at this age, a person wants to live life with friends, career, love and never ending joy. These are just the basic things which every person would want from life. After all, we all are suckers for happiness. So was Pallavi who was 25 when her life was rudely or should I say gruesomely cut short by the wrath of her apartment watch guard.

There isn’t much we know about her but yes from the media and papers, I have learnt that she was a law student and a legal advisor for Farhan Aktar’s film production house. Pallavi was definitely enjoying a lucrative career with the addition of her love life in the picture as well. She must have surely had dreams just like all of us. But God decided to cut on her dreams leaving her life like the shattered glass that can NEVER be fixed.

They say when the time comes, the time comes and there is nothing anybody can do about it. I wonder if Pallavi knew that her time had come. Of course not, she wouldn’t have known, not until her guard pulled the knife at her. She wouldn’t have know it when she came to her apartment in Mumbai at night 11 pm. Nor would she have known when the lights went off and she contacted the electrician to fix it. Not when the electrician came to fix it with the company of the guard who stole her house key without her knowledge. Not when the lights went out for the second time at 1 pm.

What followed wouldn’t have given Pallavi time to think at all. The guard entered into the stranger prohibited area to rape her. Pallavi, who put up a fight to safeguard herself till the end was no match for a knife that slit her throat.

The next day, the papers and media swarmed around to catch the heart wrenching death of the 25 year old law student. The guard has been arrested and he has made the confession to the killing citing the reason to an earlier spat with the law student which didn’t go even with him. He probably thought killing her would make him even. Squashing her dreams with the knife would have given him the relief.

Such horrific rage in a human calls for a wakeup call. While this incident is ghastly and dreadful, it offers a disturbing thought of when does a human decide to kill another? If so, are his reasons justified? I wonder if there are any justifiable reasons for killing.

The word safety has lost its meaning. While the media and the debaters decide whom to blame for the safety of women, I would like to pray for Pallavi’s soul to rest in peace. It still leaves the question open – If death is certain, is there is anything at all that is certain about life? I guess, when the time comes, it does come.